Sunday, December 16, 2012


Taking into consideration my certain affinity of mental challenges a.k.a arguing  :)!! I recently explored a different perspective on the mind.

If our mind were a courtroom where would the EGO  play? This amazing trickster or alchemist if you will plays every role and does it to perfection. The victim~ armed with a false sense of connection and protection for the heart. The lawyer~ armed with every fact needed to win the case working side by side with the stenographer so this role will never forget a memory and can pull on one when needed. The guard blocking out all sense of feeling or heart's desire. And then most of all the Almighty Judge who will rule in favor of what is right which will in turn always be the EGO.

I toyed with the notion of asking the EGO to continue their pursuit and love of the argument but this time to lobby and lobby for love, this will be the only way to truly set yourself free~ saturate the EGO in LOVE. Use its many powers and gifts for LOVE for GOOD.

What would happen if the people of the world begin to drop their own EGO and its powerful energy into the energy of the heart? What would our world look like??? I invite you to close your eyes and imagine.

Saturday, December 15, 2012

What The World Needs Now Is Love Sweet Love

I am at a loss for words in regards to the events of yesterday in Connecticut. How anyone could open fire on innocent children is beyond my comprehension. I feel as though my spirit is trying to claw through my skin to go and "do" something, anything to help alleviate the pain, the unnecessary pain that has been caused. I can only pray for everyone, not just those in Connecticut but everyone we all are in need of prayers because we all live in a world where this happens.

While speaking with a friend today we both pondered what to do, what can we I invite you here today to greet someone with love today, greet them with your heart. Please turn your attention from the downward direction of your device ( a coincidence we all must look down while roaming the world to look at our smartphones / devices ~ I think not!!!) and look up, look up, look around and actually see someone. We have stopped doing this in this world, we are disconnected from each other but most of all from ourselves. I often envision the people of  America walking around and we all have our heads off to the side of us, I see it in the studio, on the streets, in doctors offices, etc.  Our head is running the show and is not connected to the rest of us. So I urge and beg you all please, step outside of your network and greet someone today, in the eyes, through your heart and send them love.  You do not know what impact you could possibly have, it may just make someone feel good, or even feel awkward since it has become so foreign, or you could just maybe "see" the signs we need to see to in order to help someone.

Sending LOVE

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Don't Speak

I grew up in a dysfunctional home, like so many of us did and do however I am finding that the older I am getting the more insight I have into the depth of the situation. My Father took the heat since his illness was front and center. The illness that eventually killed him in fact by the early age of 51. I had my time of wondering why he would choose the bottle over his family however I surrendered for the very first time and accepted him for illness and all at 17. I learned to have no expectations from any situation, learned that he would not change and therefore learned to have a relationship if you will with my Dad for a good 7 years before he passed. I am so grateful for the time we had and the life lesson. My Dad turned out to be a constant force in my life and the loss of him shook me, shook my foundation more than I had realized it could. The irony is he was the one who never changed, always the same and my Mom is the complete opposite, always changing everything from her mind to her beliefs to her desires and so on.....and so he turned out to be a sense of safety for me. My alcoholic Father was safe.....

Due do his disease and consequences from the disease we ended up in therapy to learn about Alcoholism and a very early age. We learned to speak~ my Mother wanted us to talk about everything and anything, let nothing stir and fester just get it out! Helpful yes~ to an extreme absolutely. What I have found in the 10 years since his passing is I do not speak so much. With each year I have become quieter and quieter in a very good way. Some people may find me distant but the truth of the matter is I sort out my drama now, I used to have something come up and get on the phone to vent to anyone and everyone leaving me in circles and confused about how I really felt. Now I wait, I do not pick up the phone and I wait to see if I am really upset about this or not, does it need validation or do I need to be heard, most times I find I don't. It is just idle chit chat out in the atmosphere that isn't serving much of a purpose. I think his passing had much to do with this, I got hit with a major dose of life at 24 and my perspective changed, I grew up and with doing this I became less dramatic, less concerned with others and much more concerned with the big stuff, like what lies beneath....

One of the poignant moments on this spiritual journey was when I was speaking to me teacher during my Yoga Teacher Training program and told her I just couldn't break some pattern, I had talked it to death and tried to see all sides yet was getting no where. She simply said "maybe you need to stop talking" and it changed me forever, I grew up trained to talk so the concept of not talking had never truly occurred, once this "hit" home I was able to really begin to dive into my soul and find my way home.

I am still finding my way and I now listen much more than I ever have, I try my best to empathize when I listen to things that in my perspective are small and petty but to the person saying them they are HUGE~ it makes this path difficult sometimes, but learning to listen has helped a ton, I can retreat within and decipher if it is worth speaking back or best to just listen. It is always a work in a progress and there is always something however I am just so grateful for the opportunity to be here and to have the chance to explore this life good and bad~ you need both, the tough times / down right bad times give you the juiciness you know, the ooey gooey stuff that helps to transcend you to the next level! It is just so awesome to be alive~ such a gift.

So the question tonight to put out there is how does it feel not to speak?